Today's question is: which celebrity family provides the best role model in modern Britain? It would be appropriate if it were the Royal Family. Apart from their constitutional position the Royals should justify their continuing existence by leading lives of exemplary decorum until being required to fetch up to open new gasworks, Parliament, and the like.
Unfortunately the Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh sired a pretty dysfunctional bunch never far from divorce or scandal and her grandsons Princes William and Harry, to be charitable, remain untested.
So we have the Beckhams - David's alleged fling with Rebecca Loos being now very ancient history. No other couple - when not separated by the Atlantic - are pictured more lovingly with their children. As far as one can tell they seem decent enough people given their wealth and fame.
But the couple's peculiar narcissism bars them from the role model crown. She of the undulating bosoms and he of the illustrated body and frequent comic hairstyles cannot be the best this nation has to offer.
Step forward then Jamie Oliver, wife Jools, young daughters, and his proud mum and dad. Jamie's campaign to improve school dinners and his Fifteen Foundation training chefs from among the young and disadvantaged sets him on the side of the angels. But it is the way he has incorporated his whole family into the Jamie Oliver industry, which yields a warm glow.
It would be too awful if Jamie's halo were ever to slip and like Tiger Woods is revealed to have a zipper on an elastic. Imagine if he were caught on a sex tape cheating on Jools with a free-range chicken. Where would we turn for role model inspiration?